You Might As Well Hang It on the Shelf
Minh Lê (Class of 2001)

Was it worth it?

Looking back on the past four years, I wonder… did I make the right decision? I mean, sure, being a member of Dartmouth Ultimate was great, but was it worth all the sacrifices? I can't help but ask this question as I sit here and contemplate my future… a future with some really nasty toes.

Of my ten toenails, I would say that 3 of them are only slightly abnormal. The other seven I consider Casualties of War. Not a pretty sight.

Even both of my beloved pinky toes are now hideously deformed. And given their already shy disposition as the runts of the toe family, one can only imagine what this will do to their self-esteem.

But no, I'm proud of you little guys (Yes, I am now talking to my toes). This should only boost your confidence! Be proud, my little foot soldiers! By my honor, I shall not forget your sacrifice.

Each of you has earned a place in Dartmouth Ultimate's long and storied tradition. You gave your lives in exciting (and sometimes not so exciting) participation in the game we lovingly refer to as Ultimate.

Each toe has its own heroic story, from the unassuming and unnamed second toe on the left foot to the overbearing Right Big Toe (who met his fate in a traumatic post tournament shower incident).

But regardless of how you met your doom, your lives were indeed honorable. For you chose not to live in the conventional manner of the pedestrian toe.

Other toes spend their lives blindly going to the market and going "Wee, wee, wee!" All the way home, basking in the perceived glory of their capitalist dream.

But are these little piggies truly happy living such a shallow existence?

Yours was a higher calling, the call of the Spirit of the Game. Something that all toes around the Ultimate World feel within the very depths of their being and are willing to die for.

To cleat up is an act of a divine order. It is a conscious choice to leave behind the comfortable tedium of the mundane world and participate in something far greater and infinitely more beautiful.

And it is by no means an easy life. Waking up in the prehistoric hours of a cold Saturday morning to drive 3 hours just to be placed into a week-old sock and stuffed into a cleat that bears the stench of Death… there are far easier ways for a toe to make a living, make no mistake about it. Many a toe has encountered adversity only to retreat to the designer comfort of argyle socks and imported italian loafers.

But the lamb of comfort is worth sacrificing in order to enter into the Ultimate World. A truly magical place where air bounces and hammers rain down from the sky. This is a world where people fly and spirits soar.

The Spirit of the Game infuses a toe with an energy that has an effect beyond the cleat and adapts itself to any and all footwear. A toe need never feel alone when playing Ultimate.

Ultimate forms a unique mentholated golden bond that transcends the realm of the banal digital experience. Live it, Love it, Lay it out.

You have entered into a realm of heightened spiritual awareness. A world where fingers and toes, elbows and sideburns forget their petty differences and work together in harmony in pursuit of a disc. In pursuit of a dream.

You are no longer just a toe, you are part of something greater. You are one with the universe. You are God.

So, as I sit here, a jobless graduate of the College on the Hill, I (and probably my parents) wonder if I wasted or spent too much time on Ultimate.

But then a familiar taint reaches out from the nether regions of my memory and I am transported to the huddle before a game. Hats backwards, thumbs on disc.
I look around and see a random collection of dorks (some of my closest friends) preparing to go out on the field as one and play a game that we love. Ahhh… Smells like Fun.

The Cheer starts and it gets quiet as everyone in the huddle begins to breath the same familiar beat of the Imperial March. My entire body, from head to toe, is in tune with this pulsating mass of nameless energy just waiting to explode.

"YOU'RE PLAYING DARTMOUTH…"

YES. It was worth it.

I only regret that I have but ten toes to give to Dartmouth Ultimate.