Thoreau said, “Let us first be as simple and well as Nature ourselves.” His words reflect and inform what I plan to write. Calvin (from Calvin and Hobbes) said, “When birds burp, it must taste like bugs.” His words - wise as they are - do not.

When I decided to come to Dartmouth, most people in Cincinnati reacted with either a blank look or an alarmed, “But it’s in the middle of nowhere!” Indeed, as everyone’s favorite Colombia student pointed out in his editorial, our only friends are squirrels, or something like that. I probably just didn’t understand his sophisticated city-speak.

Like many students, I considered the College’s isolation a drawback. Recently though, while reading an article in The D about seniors being trained for job interviews, I began to see the wilderness that engulfs us in a new light. The article brought to mind the overwhelming competitiveness of today’s world. Achievement is demanded at every level to insure acceptance at the next: middle school, high school, college, graduate school, etc. There are now elite preschools, starting the game yet earlier. Preschools. While I believe that one of Dartmouth’s strengths is its relatively laid¬back atmosphere, we are certainly a part of this crazy mess.

What’s the antidote to the insanity? Look around!

Here we are - an elite, competitive college in the middle of the woods! The better-faster-stronger mentality is in direct, unavoidable contrast with nature’s measured patience and slow, stately growth. Even if your DOC trip was the only time you’ll ever sample nature’s bounty, there’s a lesson to be learned from the lone pine above us. While I’m no Thoreau, I don’t have to be bitten by a moose to figure it out: slow down. Appreciate your time here. Stop and smell the granite. Hazrat Inayat Khan said, “Everything in life is speaking in spite of its apparent silence.” The majestic hills around us, then, have something to say: “Chill, dude. Seriously.” Nature is to Dartmouth as the botched hypnosis is to Ron Livingston’s character in Office Space: a breath of fresh air, and a whole new perspective.

So, next time you see your trip leaders - who first showed you Dartmouth’s wild surroundings - tell them, “Thank you for helping me to combat the oppressive socio-cultural forces of our achievement-obsessed world, and its competitive preschools.” Your trip leaders may stare at you, hopelessly confused, but at least you tried.

Thank the squirrel, too. You know, the one who’s your best friend. After all, although that Colombia student made fun of where we are, he’s the one in the epicenter of global finance. Sure, we’re a world-class institution, but here, outside the big city, we get to pretend that money is not a universally oppressive, soul-crushing force. Here at Dartmouth, the Big Green is pretty leaves, not cold cash. Is it all an illusion? Definitely. But look how pretty they are!

So, next time a friend is flipping out about a big exam, or his chances at some med school, you’ll know what to do. Simply place one hand on his shoulder, point the other towards the hills, and repeat the mountains’ mantra.

Chill, dude. Seriously.

Alex Howe ‘08 hails from Cincinnati. He’s likely to major in Psychology, and enjoys writing, acting, and watching squirrels.