7-Eleven Protest

In support of our print issue, The Dartmouth New Frontiersmen, we went out to the Green and protested the evil government conspiracy that is 7-Eleven! Click here to view our…

Sherlock Brolmes: Frat Detective, Part II

“COME OUT COME OUT WHEREVER YOU AAAAAHHH!!!” screamed Sherlock Brolmes as he took a sledgehammer to the wooden wall of Zeta Zeta Zeta’s basement, looking for their stolen composite picture….

15 Names for Dartmouth Herds

There are many names for groups of animals that are freaking ridiculous. A gaggle of geese. An army of frogs. A raft of ducks. A troubling of goldfish. A business…

O, To Be A Mortician!

O, To Be A Mortician! O Loveliest of Lives! O Sweetest of Dreams! To be a mortician, and spend my night frolicking in the palaces of embalmment, listening to The…

Sherlock Brolmes: Frat Detective, Part I

“WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK I AM?” screamed Sherlock Brolmes into his cell phone before flinging it across the room in a drunken rage. “Another black North Face jacket?”…

Origins of Cheap Alcohol

1. Franzia Caprese, Italy, 1972: Maria: “Quick, Gabriella, step on those grapes faster! Franz the Giant Baby, he grows thirsty!” Gabriella: “I am trying as hard as I can, but…

Who Killed JFK? : Your History Professor

By Your History Professor Well, you see, there is academic consensus that Kennedy was killed by a man named Lee Harvey Oswald. Did he really do it? Was it someone…

Who Killed JFK? : Some Dude

By: Somebody We all know JFK died, right?  But did you know that some guy killed him?  Totally wicked!  Apparently this guy waits on a hill with a gun and…