PREGAME

And now, the only band in the Ivy League that thinks New Haven is a nursing home for slumlords, the DCMB!

At this time, we, the DCMB, would like to thank Yale University for having us play here in the historical Yale Bowl, one of the largest Ivy League Stadiums. As we traveled down the highways this morning to reach New Haven, we were awed by the number of parking spaces so close to the stadium. Gee Whiz. We feel a sense of pride as we, the DCMB, march in step, representing our Dartmouth family. Watch now as the DCMB forms a large Y and plays the Yale alma mater, Boola Boola.

BOOLA BOOLA (WALTZ) Y Form

MEN OF D Conc. Form

HALFTIME

And now, the only band in the Ivy League that thinks the Yale Bowl is a new line of theftproof Tupperware products, the DCMB!

Well, it seems only appropriate for the DCMB to talk about one of the popular choices for Dartmouth's 15th President, one of the heroes of the world of animation. Yes, it's Popeye the Sailor man, a paragon of virtue, strength, and bad table manners. How many mothers would let their own children eat their food right from the can? In the interest of keeping the story of Popeye alive, we urge other schools to adopt Popeye as a sort of token mascot. We, the DCMB have come up with some new lyrics for the song, so that Yale can sing the old favorite as well. Here's one:

I'm Eli the Yalie Man

My school is a garbage can

My dorm is a slum

I hate the alums

As much as I hate the band.

Gee, that one was pretty good. Here's another:

I'm Eli the Yalie Man

My best friend's my own right hand

I feel kind of dumb

Because I can't come

To parties where beer is banned.

Gosh, it's really great how the DCMB has found a way to revive old traditions, especially for other schools. Watch now as the DCMB forms a symbolic pipe and plays the theme song to "I'm Popeye the Sailor Man."

While we're on the subject of board games, whatever happened to Monopoly? It seems as though when a new administration comes in, changes are bound to occur. Look what happened to Wayne Dick, who satirized the Gay Lesbian Awareness Days, or G.L.A.D. Dick decided to put up his own B.A.D., or Bestiality Awareness Days signs around campus. He was in the doghouse with faculty, and was found guilty of an act of violence towards… well, you Yalies know the rest of the story. Luckily, President Schmidt realized what was going on, and Dick was liberated. We, the DCMB, salute both President Schmidt and Wayne Dick, and offer you this: In case the next time you are not so lucky, and you are forced to go to jail, directly to jail, without even passing GO, we offer you this: a Get out of Yale Free Card. Watch now as the band forms a giant FREE card and plays that ragamuffin favorite, The Muppet Show.

MUPPET SHOW BOX FORM

Before leaving, we would like to salute that great inter - collegiate sport, swimming. We, the DCMB are proud of our Swim team's history, and we are sure that the Yale band is as well. Why, we even went as far as doing a fancy underwater marchout at their last meet. The Tuba and trombone players had no trouble, although half of the drummers drowned. But Gosh, our conductor sure looked swell when he did a bellyflop off the high diving board! Watch now as the DCMB salutes those quickly moving swimmers and forms the two fastest swimmers we know of. For Yale, Percival Proteus PolliWog. For Dartmouth, we have Samuel Stevens Sermen. Watch now as these two literally swim across the field to the pulsating beat of our favorite song to swim by, Hawaii 5-0.

5-0 Poliwog Form

We would like to thank you for your attention, and hope that you all have a nice day.

And now, the only band in the Ivy League that thinks Eli Yale was caught playing doctor with Susan Radcliffe, the DCMB!