Wagner's mom has got Halloween going on.
Saturday:
(at Rauner) "Where the fuck is Jenn? Why is she still in bed?"
PL 15, Smith 1
Homecoming hangovers aside, we came out strong with our savage-and-a-half team. The ground featured actual frozen lumps. Little Liz had sticky fingers.
PL 13, UMass 3
At one point in the game, the wind came up, and nobody could hold onto the disc. Every time it came near a UMass player she would clap thin air. Suddenly, Rain picked up a turn, and threw one of the sweetest backhand hucks I've (yes, this is Liz typing) ever seen. Wind be damned.
"Hmm. I really wonder where Jenn is. Let's try to get her cell phone number."
PL 13, Brown 3
Tiffanie recovered from her molasses cookie and BID LIKE CRAZY. Lots of Ds and scores.
"Oh good, someone called back with Jenn's phone number. Let's give it a try."
Ludi had some nice cuts and hot grabs. Freshman, hUh? ("So what I really want to know is who's available.")
"Text message from Jenn: 'Got arrested. Getting out now, will call asap.'"
Columbia 11, PL 7
Unfortunately, we let the upwind-downwind field get the best of us in the first half. Crazy, crazy wind. They took half 7-1. Lorraine jumped and shook her booty by her lonesome. Then we remembered how to play ultimate, and won the second half 6-4. Next time we'll have to tickle those rally monkeys a little earlier.
Sunday:
Jenn arrives. She looks the same as she did the day before she got arrested. except now she has a new tattoo and three ho's. Tiffanie arrives too, claiming from her sprawled position in her trunk that she only remembers the first two glasses of wine. Haley and Vi also arrive, but apparently their lives are uneventful and boring for the purposes of tournament write-ups.
Tufts 10, PL 5
We forgot to get psyched up for this game. Again, we rallied late to make it respectable...but we really should've taken it to them sooner. A freshman who will remain nameless (and available) actually kicked them the disc in the endzone for the winning score.
PL 9, Umass (again) 4
Liz had a Callahan and a layout for a rolling pull. my inspiration. Anne took care of business as a mark in the zone. Shmi had a ton of amazing bids and was key on every O and D.
PL 7, Brown 2
Brown wanted to keep the game short. Haley stepped it up on offense on some long points there with her hot cutting from the stack. Along with Anne, Lil Liz played a great mark including a Callahan. And Jen came up with a superfine layout D.
Layout emerges as Chumpions. Jenn emerges as a free woman minus drunken disorderly conduct fine.
that's all folks--
dogtongue
