Paraplegic Girl Scout: Hello. Would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?
Man: Sure! I'll take two boxes of Thin Mints, please.
Paraplegic Girl Scout: Here you go.
Man: [opening package] Wait a minute; these cookies are all broken into crumbs!
Paraplegic Girl Scout: Even if the outside is broken, there's still sweetness on the inside.
Counselor: Okay, Susie, can you go around and pick up those poles for me? Great. Becky, why don't you start getting out the sleeping bags for us.
Paraplegic Girl Scout: What can I do, Counselor?
Counselor: I have a very special job for you! Can you go very fast in that wheelchair?
Paraplegic Girl Scout: Well, I've never turned the speed above 3 before...
Counselor: See if you can go chase down some dinner for us.
Girl Scout A: One time when I was a kid, I broke my arm when I fell off a swing!
[oohs]
Girl Scout B: One time at basketball camp, I tripped over a ball and and sprained my ankle.
Paraplegic Girl Scout: One time, I fell out of my wheelchair into the fireplace.
Guide: In the old days, men used to oppress women. But now, women are free to do whatever they want! You, what do you want to do?
Girl Scout A: I want to be a doctor!
Guide: Great! What about you?
Girl Scout B: I want to be a scientist!
Guide: Awesome! How about you?
Paraplegic Girl Scout: I want to walk again.
Guide: [pause]
Priest: God made every one of you to be very, very special.
Paraplegic Girl Scout: God made me this way so that I can triumph over adversity!
Priest: Actually, God made you that way because you descend from the Tribe of Simeon, the Israelites damned to be divided and scattered.
Paraplegic Girl Scout: My dad likes to say that I'm from the Tribe of Chernobyl.